Fall break was dull. I'm not looking forward to finals, but strangely I'm not looking forward to winter break either. I just want to knock down these intro classes so I can leave Peoria and go do something interesting.

I kind of want to be a live DJ. Actually, I'd really like that. But I am a prospectless psych student and I lack the funds to do silly things like "chase my dreams."

I'm only about half as bitter as I sound.

It was a good run while it lasted

I had gone about a month without drinking coffee, but had to break my streak this morning, after waking up before dawn and being unable to go back to sleep, resulting in one caffeine-addled brain working feverishly on a sociology paper, which is due tomorrow.

I'm a good student.

If I survive to old age, I'm going to be like those old people who drop everything and demand complete silence when Matlock reruns are on, except with House reruns.

"NOT NOW DAMMIT, I NEED TO SEE HOW HOUSE IS GOING TO SOLVE THIS MEDICAL MYSTERY"

...just kidding. I'm 22 and I do that now.






What a curmudgeon!

VIDYA GAMES

Ok so, this is upside down, and the band isn't all that great.


But still. Even if you weren't in marching band, you should be able to appreciate this.

I say, girl, you don't seem to be apprehending the general gist of what I'm trying to convey here. Maybe you oughta take a second, let your head catch up to your tongue before it gets sunburned. That was a joke, darling, a joke.

(Nice girl but she's about as bright as Alaska in December.)

Now my heart is beating fast

It's a rhythm I could dance to



Mint Royale - My Heart Is Beating Fast

"You can't just randomly stab the temporal lobe and hope you hit the right spot."
"I'll only take little tiny pieces."
"Until what?"
"Until I find the problem."
"Or you kill it."
"No, I'll keep going even if I kill it."

Today I used Rorschach as a verb, in the past tense. Rorschached.

DIES IST TECHNO SEX!!! OONCE OONCE OONCE OONCE OONCE OONCE OONCE!!!

I listen to music. A lot. I don't listen to trance nearly as much as I used to, but I can tell you that just about everything David West does - remixes and originals alike - gives me chills. The good kind of chills.

If you have any interest in electronic music or are curious about the different genres within it, check out Ishkur's Guide to Electronic Music. It has background information on the different styles as well as multiple (low-quality) samples of each. The guy knows his stuff, but he's also pretty biased towards more classic trance (a lot of "back in my day" spouting). But the information is accurate and it has a cool interface.

Some of his descriptions are pretty hilarious also (this post's title is from his German Trance section).

Anyway, it's a good way to waste some time and maybe you'll learn something. The more you know!

Incidentally, I don't like the vast majority of the various trance samples he uses, so it's not like an example of what I listen to. Once I find a file hosting site that isn't Rapidshit, I'll put some music up.


Jazzstep, under the Jungle section, is interesting. I feel like the genre has a lot of potential, like a modernized fusion style. Sometimes I wish I just had endless time and money so I could focus my energies on finding new styles like this.




"If she were here I'd probably be just as crazy now as I was then. Isn't that ridiculous?

Well, I guess it isn't, really. Bein' crazy about a girl like her is always the right thing to do."

I spent all day studying; I'm going to spend all day tomorrow and then all weekend studying.

Then I'll probably study some more.


The fun never starts!

Today I rolled my eyes so hard I think I hurt myself.


Don't ask.

Oh, Peoria

"Hi, I'm Paul Newman's disembodied head. As you can see from my face on this can of delicious marinara sauce, I'm happy to tell you that this sauce is all natural, and you should buy some."






"'Cause if I see you walk out of here with that Ragu you've got there, I will not hesitate to beat you down so far you'll have to look up to see the soles of my boots. If I wore boots, or had feet."




This weekend I got some things done but mostly wandered about town and played around with my camera, which I've decided to carry around with me more often so it can get some use. I stopped in Naturally Yours to follow up on my job app, still waiting on that. While in there I perused the aisles looking for anything interesting, and came upon this little mystery:


Bible Bread. While my initial thought was for catholic bread and wine, what really drew my attention was the multitude of varieties of Bible Bread. Specifically, the garlic kind, shown above. Don't they have to use unspiced crackers for that? If so, then what is Bible Bread for? What is its relation to religion?

Then it hit me. The regular/multi grain kinds are for church service (or, as Matt suggested, for passover). The garlic kind is to ward off vampires.

The scenario in which this would be useful should be obvious.

[Minister]: "Eat this bread, it is my body; drink thi-"
[Someone in the back]: "EVERYBODY RUN! THE VAMPIRES HAVE RETURNED!"
[Minister, reaching below the table for box of garlic bible bread]: "...don't worry."


When I was done wandering through Naturally Yours and taking pictures of bible bread and generally looking like a suspicious character, I found my way to Friar Tuck to look for anything unusual, and discovered that they were hiring. Given that Naturally Yours is being stubborn on giving me an update as to whether or not I have a job there (they're looking for a cashier position... how difficult a decision is this? Just pick someone at random and let me know. Tch.), I decided to snag an application. Could be interesting, I need the money, and who knows, maybe this is just the start I need to fall into a spiral of excessive debauchery and eventual alcoholism.

Anyway, I traipsed about the aisles of the liquor store for a bit, and discovered this:


Now, there are two things that I love about this. Its brazen proclamation that this cosmopolitan mix does in fact contain alcohol is what caught my eye. But what makes me give this special mention is the phrasing of the proclamation: "Alcohol is in it!"

It seems...cumbersome. Inefficient. Alcohol... is IN IT. Granted, I can understand the need to explain that there is alcohol in a mixer; many mixes don't actually contain the required ingredient that makes extracurricular beverages have that "extra-"; if one were to assume the mix non-alcoholic and make a virgin-but-not-really-virgin-because-ALCOHOL-IS-IN-IT cosmo for their kids (admittedly that's just kind of weird but for the sake of example just go with it), they'd be in for a potentially-hilarious surprise. But I've digressed.

Couldn't they just incorporate the alcohol part into the title? "Daily's such-and-such-percent alcohol cosmopolitan mixer". While we're on the subject, isn't "Daily's" an interesting name for a booze producer? Some sort of subtle alcoholism-inducing message? Sinisterrrrr.

Here are a few other pictures from the weekend, including the final product of an epic battle with a dead tree that I helped my dad take down. I was planning to get a video of the event, but I was busy using a maul to hammer wedges into the opposing side of the tree (so it would fall the way we wanted it to) while a chainsaw went to work a dangerously-close few feet in front of me. Also I was wearing a cowboy hat and drinking straight bourbon while things exploded in the background and Journey was there and they played "Don't Stop Believin'". Okay so maybe only the part with the hammer/chainsaw actually happened, but when there's a film adaptation of my life, there may be... embellishments.

Come single guy and gal unto me pay attention:
Don't ever fall in love,
It's the devil's own invention!
For once he fell in love with a maiden so bewitchin',
Miss Henrietta Bell down in Captain Kelly's kitchen!


-Dropkick Murphys - "Captain Kelly's Kitchen"

Look alive, kidlets.

Videophones.

Let's talk about why video conversation devices (pronounced deeee-vices) - so adamantly predicted by bad movies to be the way of the future - will never usurp standard audio-only telephones as the major means of interpersonal communication.

The standard practice of engaging in a telephone conversation is like a personal conversation in that there is a sender and a receiver of messages at all times. The caveat, of course, is that in a phone conversation, neither party can see the other. What difference does this make? Think about it.

The most obvious difference is that physical vanity over a telephone conversation is meaningless. You can speak in a clear, business-like manner and still be lounging in a recliner, unkempt and in your pajamas, all the while creating the impression that you physically appear business-like and formal. If videophones became mainstream, this would cause more anxiety regarding phone conversations than any of us would care to admit.

Every time the vidphone rings, most people would run to the nearest mirror/window/microwave-door and check their hair, and/or actually put on some pants. I know this doesn't apply to everyone but as a culture we are very concerned about how people see us physically. The stress this would create is mind-boggling. The concept of "letting your hair down" after a hard day's work would cease to exist. (And the more you think about it, the more you realize how far it has gone in our society. Vanity, I mean.)

But, you probably already could have figured that much out. Let's move on to a more interesting point.

The subtler difference between audio and video/personal conversation is that it is much easier to feign rapt attention over the telephone. The voice on the other end could be talking away and all you need to do to hold your end of the unwritten conversational bargain is make a few affirmative sounds now and then, as you trim your fingernails, do tai chi chuan, or struggle to keep in the game while you wait for that crucial Tetris-inducing line block (I am guilty of this).

But from a psychoanalytical (god I love psych buzzwords) perspective, there is more going on here than a desire to entertain yourself while the voice on the other end carries on. On a maybe-subconscious level, we love the feeling of deviance that we get from making someone believe they have our undivided concentration while the reality is, our focus is very much split.

It makes us feel as though we hold power over the conversation... that we own the two-way street and have made what we have to say more important.

But therein lies the crux of it: it cuts both ways. We make the assumption that the voice on the other end could never be doing the same to us as we speak. We never suspect that they, too, are wielding this petty power over us.

To quote D.F. Wallace, it is the "bilateral illusion of unilateral attention". It's almost beautiful.


We will never abandon this attention-divided anticonversation in favor of videophones. I guarantee you, if any major communication company creates an affordable mainstream video communication device, it will not last long, and we will return to our auditory-exclusive ways.

Late nights at a cafe with soft jazz and intimacy with the finer details of cerebrospinal fluids. Insomnia-induced hallucinations make you wonder if you'll make it home.

Helium voiced girl with too much makeup looks at you and bats eyeliner eyes and wonders if maybe you could like help her with her anatomy work because how did you get an A on that last test, I like can't believe I need to know this for nursing but could you please just help me with this.

Baby blue eyes and designer jeans, highlighted blond hair and all of that melanin production from the tanning booth or...wherever. Not a thought running through her head.

All of that which the world demands of her.


You pretend you didn't hear her. You pretend you have somewhere else to be.


Close your eyes, lovers.
Clench your fists.
Bite your lip 'til it bleeds.